And so the countdown continues.
I've been pushing pretty hard this past week to try and get everything done before I leave- packing my trailer, packing my office, pushing cases through funding roundtables, visiting homeowners, tying up transition plans,saying goodbye to friends and work contacts, working on India trip plans, finalizing moving plans, searching for a cell phone, repairing my laptop, cat sitting, and trying not to burst into tears at any given moment. All of this was complicated by a few issues- I was unexpectedly left as the only staff member on the coast for a week- a week when 4 long term volunteers terminated their service with us and needed collection of their receipts/blackberries/keys/credit cards/etc, exit interviews, rides to the airport, etc...and in the middle of all that, my back also went out, so I have to spend several hours a day laying flat on the floor just to be able to function the rest of the day.
There is NO way I will get it all done. Not a chance.
But somehow, I've become okay with that. I had a good chat with one of the smartest women I've ever known, who also happens to be the friend who's known me the longest, and she helped to open my eyes to this: As much as I don't like to admit it, this work is bigger than me, this agency is bigger than me, this mission is bigger than me. If I don't get it done, someone else will pick it up. PDA actually had interviews for my position this week, so it looks like they will be hiring someone to come and take my place soon. Yes, it's possible, Erin, for someone else to do you job- probably better than you. You weren't the only one God called down here to help out. So get over yourself. Do what you can without busting your back/bursting into tears, say a little prayer, and let the rest go. I think I'll tattoo that on the inside of my arm, in case I forget.